Overcoming sexual anxiety

Sex is a natural and important part of life, yet it can also be a source of anxiety for many people. If you’re struggling, these 6 steps for overcoming sexual anxiety will help you enjoy a healthy and fulfilling sex life.

Studies have shown that sexual anxiety is a common experience for many individuals. According to the American Sexual Health Association, around 15-20% of adults in the United States experience some form of sexual dysfunction, which can include sexual anxiety. Additionally, a study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that over 30% of men and women experience sexual anxiety at some point in their lives.

The prevalence of sexual anxiety can also be demonstrated by personal experiences. Many individuals may feel embarrassed or ashamed to discuss their experiences on sexual anxiety, but opening up about the issue can help to reduce the stigma surrounding it.

For example, some individuals may feel nervous or anxious about their ability to perform sexually or may worry about their partner’s expectations. Others may feel uncomfortable with certain sexual acts or may struggle with body image issues that affect their sexual confidence. 

But one thing we must know is that by sharing their stories and experiences, individuals can help to raise awareness about sexual anxiety and promote a more open and supportive dialogue around the topic.

I have to admit I did have my fair share of sexual anxiety and if I’m being totally honest I still do. The only difference between now and the first time is, I figured out why and I found a way to deal with it. At first, I had to result to booze and some other nasty things (which we recommend that you shouldn’t do) to take my mind off of Overthinking all the things that could go wrong. But as I grew I learned to communicate with my mind better by getting into mindful breathing and also communication with my partner. And you will find that communication helps a lot.

I like to think Communication is key for everything. So maybe start with a little communication, talk about how you feel about this stuff, what you like and don’t, expectations, and maybe fantasies and from there you can ease into the whole situation. 

Overcoming sexual anxiety


Sexual anxiety can be caused by a variety of factors, including past experiences, fear of sexual performance, body image issues, fear of sexual rejection and sometimes even stress.

it’s important to understand the root of your anxiety. Are you worried about your performance? Do you feel self-conscious about your body? Are you afraid of getting pregnant or contracting an STI? sometimes it’s all of these things all at once. I know it can get overwhelming when all of these thoughts come beating down on you and your body just breaks down.

But the idea is to just sit back take a deep breath and ponder on it. Take the time to dissect each thought and reason why this is happening to you. Once you understand the source of your anxiety, you can start to address it and improve your sexual experience. 


There are several things you can do to reduce your anxiety and improve your sexual experiences.

To begin with, try to relax and focus on the pleasure you will feel, and how pleasurable you might make your partner feel, how you would feel after you both are feeling pleasured (if that made any sense).

Overcoming sexual anxiety

Secondly, Breathe deeply and let go of any negative thoughts. If you’re having trouble getting aroused, take your time and focus on the physical and emotional pleasure of sex and maybe start with foreplay or something or just do something erotic together. Maybe seeing porn together or something of the sort.

Hey, it can be argued that watching porn as a couple is good for each other, you get to know what either of you likes and can easily take your mind off the swirling wormhole of thoughts and yet still deepen your intimacy. 

6 steps for overcoming sexual anxiety

Sexual anxiety can be crippling, but it doesn’t have to be. Here are a few tips on how to overcome sexual anxiety and start enjoying sex again.

1. Talk to your partner.

The first step to overcoming sexual anxiety is to talk to your partner about it. This can be a difficult conversation, but you both must be open and honest with each other. It is important to discuss your fears and concerns and work together to create a positive and open sexual environment. Be honest about what you like and don’t like, and don’t be afraid to ask for help.

2. Get comfortable with your body.

One of the reasons people may feel anxious about sex is because they’re not comfortable with their bodies. Spend some time getting to know your body and exploring your sexuality. And if that’s not enough, get into some form of exercise and make it a routine. One of the benefits of exercise is to boost your confidence and makes you feel better in your skin. 

3. Start slow.

If you’re feeling anxious, it’s best to start slow. Sometimes when you go to the pool you don’t just wanna dive right in. You walk to the side of the pool, Dip your toe in it, then gradually sit, and then slide in totally (pun intended). I’m guessing you get the picture.  

Try getting involved in some foreplay, then some light touching or kissing before progressing to more intimate activities.

4. Take it one step at a time.

Don’t try to do everything at once. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a step back and focus on one thing at a time. Baby steps…

5. Use relaxation techniques.

When you’re feeling anxious, your body is in a state of tension. Relaxation techniques can help to calm your mind and body, making sex more enjoyable. Look into yoga. Or mindful breathing. Mindful breathing has proven helpful to a lot of people and improving sexual experience is one of them. 

6. Talk to a therapist.

If you’re struggling to overcome sexual anxiety on your own, talking to a therapist can be helpful. A therapist can provide guidance and support and can help you to address the root of your anxiety.

Finally, don’t be hard on yourself. Everyone experiences anxiety occasionally, and there is no shame in seeking help. If you’re struggling to overcome sexual anxiety on your own, consider talking to a therapist or counselor. There is no need to suffer in silence. With a little effort, you can overcome your sexual anxiety and enjoy a healthy and fulfilling sex life. 

You can’t afford a therapist? Talk to a friend or we are always one click away, send us an email today and we will be delighted to listen and help you get through it. 

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